WDPRM #2: A mole by the name of business man

The “What Do Politicians Really Mean,” WDPRM for short, is a quick interactive news translation for vote-newbies.

Today’s big news story :

“Domestic spy agency ASIO, which scrutinised the citizenship request, previously warned the Liberal, Labor and National parties about taking cash from Mr Huang Xiangmo, fearing he could try to advance Beijing’s interests.”

“The Government has always acted consistent with the advice that we’ve received and that’s what has happened on this occasion,” he [Scott Morrison] said.

Mr Morrison highlighted laws banning foreign donations that came into force on January 1.” ABC News 06.02.2019

Translation: The Liberals, Nationals and Labor both know how to play the game, beween the three of us we accepted $1 million dollars of official donations from this Chinese mole (unofficial donations are another matter). When ASIO gave us the heads-up that Huang Xiangmo’s citizenship will be stripped for espionage, we quickly implemented a fake law to cover our fat arses. Win/win.

“He said previous political donations had been accepted “in good faith”, based on information known at the time, suggesting the Liberal Party would not return any of Mr Huang’s contributions.” ABC News 06.02.2019

Translation: Meh, there are plenty of fish which swim in our oceans. And do you  really think that Asio’s recommendation was just a recommendation?   Wink.

 

Snapshot of well networked politicians and Mr Huang Xiangmo who refused to comment and/or the Fake Media refused to request a comment:

“I prefer Manolo Blahnik to Jimmy Choo.”

 

“Lucy Turnbull is my administrator.”

 

“I’m loving that red tie.”

 

“I have an honest face.”

 

“You look like my wife.”

 

Trend setters.

 

Annabelle @ The Art of Flag-waving

WDPRM #1: Happy Chinese new year, Australia! It’s the year of the swine.

The “What Do Politicians Really Mean,” WDPRM for short, is a quick interactive news translation for vote-newbies.

DancingPigThe pre WW1 dancing pig has been digitally remastered. Note the receding hairline, the sharp teeth, the Monalisa grin and the squinty eyes.

Last Friday Australia learnt that our Military is, in on likelihood, responsible for civilian deaths.
“Australian Defence officials have revealed two RAAF fighter jets were involved in a bombing mission in Iraq that led to the deaths of Iraqi civilians, with an Iraqi man whose family members were killed putting the civilian death toll at 35.” ABC, 01.02.2019

“Air Marshal Mel Hupfeld says reports Australian airstrikes killed civilians in Iraq are credible.”
“The responsibility to take lethal action in wartime is a heavy burden to carry,” Air Marshal Hupfeld told reporters in Canberra on Thursday.” TS Morning Herald, 10.02.2019

However…

OinkOink
Oink, oink.

Minister Scott Morrison described the deaths of up to 18 Iraqi civilians during the battle for Mosul as “difficult and tragic”.  ABC, 01.02.2019

Translation: Fake conspiratorial Trumpian news. It’s collateral damage, anyway. The pointless bloodshed must continue in spite of USA unwillingness to participate in warmongering.

But just when you thought the Labor party might actually give a toss and voice a different point of view…

Silent oink
Soft squeal. (Just so to make himself relevant.)

“Opposition leader Bill Shorten said he did not want to add additional pressure on ADF personnel. “If they’ve been investigated … I’m satisfied with that.” SMH, 01.02.2019

Translation: I’m not rocking the boat, my past sexual misconduct is being used as blackmail.

So there you have it folks. La crème de la crème of Australia politics.

 

Annabelle @ The Art of Waving-flaging