The 2019 election is turning out to be the boring election in Australia I have yet to see. Bill 2.0 and Lemon King are both guilty of charisma bigotry, opting to put us all to deep sleep. Don’t let this tactic fool you, the dull façade is carefully planned and executed to make their nonsense and policies as exclusive as possible with the hope that no one will notice their lies and their ever-growing Chicom sponsored socialist reforms.
Let’s take a quick look at what our duopoly is up to thus far in this riveting battle of lacklustre traitors…
King Lemon Scomo
ABC’s abruptly zooms out of Lemon King’s face to tone down his panting and his chicom corporatist enthusiasm.
This is what the economy looks like. <spin>
The economy is people. <spin>
People want the economy to work. <spin> + <idiotic asymmetrical grin>
Working the economy is what the liberal party does. <weeeee>
We liberals love the economy. <I’m getting dizzy>
Keeping our budget bubble strong is how we secure seats. <spin>
Liberals understand the economy and the little Aussie battler. <spin>
They are both bubbles. <spin>
The economy is a bubble. <tail caught in the mouth for a brief moment>
Australia is a bubble. <spin>
I’m a bubble. <spin>
The Chinese spies who sponsor my economy loving party are a bubble. <double spin>
Mr. Speaker is a bubble. <asinine asymmetrical grin>
Stop asking the economy loving party bubble question. <nearly caught tail again>
It has taken 5 years of bubbling for the liberals to come up with the bubble budget. <hee-haw>
Thank you very much. <flicks his tail, spins off with lemon in mouth>
Rapey Bill 2.0
ABC’s slowly and dramatically zooms into Bill Spiritless’ face to reanimate his red-tinged messages.
I want to take real action to climate change and renewable energy and push energy prices down. <pause – one thousand, two thousand> + <tilt head slightly to the left> + <puss in the boots eyes> We’ll get on top of living burdens and get wages moving again by getting everyone to buy electric cars <mini-pause, one thousand> + <eyebrow lift> in the interest of middle-class people who are stuck in the past. <extra long pause – one thousand, two thousand, three thousand> My team is united in fighting for the Green’s agenda. <one thousand, two thousand> + < quizzical expression> When all these things work together the Greens and Labor are going to make the economy hum. <benevolent eyebrow knitting> Jobs, jobs, and more fictional jobs will bloom through my deindustrialisation of Australia tax policies. <one thousand, two thousand> + < Virtue signalling eyebrow knotting> Wages, wages and more wages by turning Australia into an impoverished socialist welfare State. <One thousand, two thousand> Vagina, vagina and more vagina to satisfy my sexual compulsions. <One thousand, two thousand, three thousand, four thousand, five thousand> Thank you, everybody. See you on the trail.
Australia has two choices, a) Boring & treasonous through stupidity and b) Boring & treasonous through determination. Which will you be voting for?
Annabelle @ The Art of Flag-waving